chiquimula? yeah, i went there and my wallet cried

i landed in chiquimula with two bucks left in my wallet and a stomach that'd been dreaming of tamales for three days. the bus from guatemala city dropped me off near the central park, and the heat hit like a truck full of bricks. i just checked and it's... there right now: 29.35°C, feels like 28.97, humidity at 40%-dry heat that makes your eyes water but somehow you still sweat? i don't get it. the sky was that relentless blue that makes you think the world's ending but in a good way.



i wandered around trying to look like i belonged, which is impossible when you're carrying a backpack covered in patches from every hostel in central america. the streets here are narrow, paved with those uneven stones that are murder on your ankles. kids on bikes shout 'gringo!' and then laugh when you try to pronounce 'chocolate' with a local accent. i eventually found a hostel i'd read about on some sketchy forum-$5 a night, shared bathroom, and a rooster that wakes you at 4am. perfect.

the market is a whole vibe: mounds of corn, stacks of chiles that could make a dragon sneeze, and the smell of fresh tortillas. i grabbed a plate of tacos from a lady who didn't speak a word of english but nodded when i pointed. cost me 15 quetzales, which is like two bucks. someone told me that the best thing to eat here is 'pollo en pepián', a chicken stew with a thick, spicy sauce, but you have to go early because the good stuff sells out by noon. i tried it the next day at a place called 'comedor doña carmen' (found on yelp, oddly enough) and it was legit-chicken falling off the bone, rice, and a side of plantains. total: 25Q. Yelp

i'm not a history nerd, but there's a church here, santa elena, that's supposedly from the 1500s. it's got that heavy, dark wood and saints staring at you with eyes that follow you around. a local warned me about the priest-apparently he's strict about no photos, and if you try, he'll chase you with a broom. i didn't test it. but i did hear a rumor that underneath the church there's a tunnel that the spanish priests used to sneak out to the nearby river during colonial times. some guy at the bar said if you slip the caretaker a twenty, he'll show you. i didn't have twenty, so i just stared at the floor and imagined tunnels.

the weather's been weirdly consistent: high around 29.35, low 28.08, so basically no relief from the heat. the humidity's at 40% which is low for this part of the world, so it's more of a dry oven than a sauna. i've been drinking water like it's going out of style; the locals say the tap's okay but i'm not buying it. always buy bottled, even if it's a scam. the atmospheric pressure's hanging at 1013 hPa at sea level, but down here on the ground it's 925-makes your ears pop a little. i read on Lonely Planet that the town is a bit rough around the edges, which was accurate.

if you get bored, the honduran border is just an hour east-copán ruinas is there, with those mayan ruins and a laid-back vibe. i took a chicken bus (which is literally a school bus painted with flames and murals) and paid like 30Q. the ride was an adventure in itself: the driver blasted reggaeton, we picked up a guy with a live chicken, and at one point we had to ford a river because the bridge was out. not kidding. i'd recommend it if you hate comfort.

that picture above? i have no idea what it's supposed to be, but it looked cool, so i stuck it here. maybe it's some sort of logo for chiquimula? who knows. the internet's weird.

there's this park near the center, parque central, with benches under big trees. i sat there one afternoon watching old men play chess and kids chase pigeons. the air was thick with the smell of diesel and roasted corn. someone told me that on weekends they have live music, but i missed it. next time.

look at that bench. that's basically my life now. find a bench, sit, watch the world go by. i'm trying to be less of a tourist, but i still take pictures of everything. the locals are mostly chill, but there's a guy who sells 'souvenirs' that are just rocks he painted with faces. i bought one for 10Q because he looked like he needed a meal. he told me his name was carlos and that the rocks are blessed by a shaman. i believed him? sure.

more trees. this place is greener than i expected, especially after the dry season. even though it's hot, there's shade everywhere if you know where to look.

i've been eating at the market every day; it's cheap and the food's fresh. i read on tripadvisor that the 'fonda la guanaca' is overrated and touristy. i went anyway because it was the only place with wifi. the food was okay, but the prices were triple. lesson learned: follow the crowds of workers, not the backpackers. TripAdvisor

there's a hostel i stayed at called 'el descanso del viajero' that seemed nice from the photos, but the shower was cold and the bed had a spring sticking out. still, for $5, can't complain. the owner, don roberto, gives out free coffee in the morning and tells stories about the time he met a famous guatemalan singer. i think he made it up, but it's entertaining.

the nightlife here is... nonexistent? there are a few bars that play soccer on tvs, and people drink cerveza until late. i tried a local brew called 'gall' which is like a weird mix of beer and something else. it grew on me. i'd say if you want to party, go to antigua. but if you want to just exist, chiquimula's perfect.

i've met a few other travelers: a german guy doing a bike tour through south america, a can lady studying mayan textiles, and a couple from spain who got lost and ended up here because their gps died. we shared a taxi to the ruins of 'san miguel' (a small site outside town) and swapped stories. the spanish guy said he saw a ghost in his hostel bathroom. i didn't ask for details.

i've started to learn a few words in 'chortí', the local mayan language. 'imox' means 'thank you', i think. it's harder than spanish, but the old ladies at the market smile when i try.

the pressure's been steady at 1013 hpa, which my weather app says is normal. i don't feel any different, but my ears did pop on the bus ride to the border. maybe that's why.

i'm leaving tomorrow, heading to the lake atitlán. i'll miss the cheap eats, the rooster at 4am, and the way people say 'buenas' no matter the time. chiquimula's not on any top 10 list, and that's kind of the point. it's raw, a little dusty, but real. if you want somewhere to reset without the tourist throngs, come here. bring cash, learn a few words, and don't trust the guy with the rocks-unless you want a cool souvenir.

i heard that the bus to guatemala city leaves whenever the driver feels like it, so i'm heading to the station at dawn. hopefully my wallet has recovered enough for a sandwich. adios, chiquimula.

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