Boston: Where My Hips and the Freeze Stole My Sanity

so i'm still thawing out from this boston trip, and not just because someone forgot to heat the hostel. i just looked outside and it's...well, that's what you get for visiting when the weather app looks like it's been cryogenically frozen. if you run out of things to do, providence and portland are just a couple hours drive away, but maybe don't? *quincy market feels like a meat locker with souvenir shops. someone told me that the north end has the best cannoli, but then another local argued it's actually the west end now-so i ended up eating three cannolis from three different places. worth it. maybe.

spent three days rummaging through vintage shops like a raccoon in a dumpster fire. cambridge had this killer military surplus jacket buried under mothballs, but the real treasure was finding a 70s disco shirt at south end that smells like regret and patchouli. overheard some drunk advice at a bar: "if you wanna find cool shit, go after 2am when the bars dump their old stuff." yeah, no. i saw a dude try to trade a neon sign for a burrito.

also, faneuil hall? more like ‘faneuil wallet-drain’. $12 for a lobster roll that tasted like freezer burn. heard whispers from a street vendor that the real eats are in downtown crossing at this hidden truck stop called ‘the blue parrot’-but their website is down. figures. here's boston's vintage scene on yelp in case you wanna gamble like i did.

my feet still look like i walked barefoot on beacon hill cobblestones-those bricks are basically medieval torture devices. someone warned me that charles river is ‘too cold to swim in’ but ‘perfect for accidentally dropping your vintage coat in.’ accurate. also, this reddit thread says locals hate tourists more than they hate winter. can confirm.

brought back a 90s windbreaker, a sweater with a questionable stain, and this weird urge to wear three scarves at once. still processing whether it was worth it. maybe check tripadvisor for less painful adventures. or just stay home.

"if you find a shop called ‘relics and rags’ near back bay*-tell the owner i owe him $7 for a hat that smelled like old books and regret."

p.s. the ‘boston calling’ music fest is apparently wild if you like paying $20 for a beer and seeing bands through fog. their site says it’s ‘the city’s best party’-but locals call it ‘where tourists go to freeze and spend money.’

"avoid the t after 10pm unless you wanna see a guy juggling knives and yelling about the patriots."

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