tirana isn’t a postcard. but here’s why i camped outside a vegan food truck wearing mismatched socks

i woke up at 5:43 a.m. sun was barely peeking through the clouds. 11.8 degrees. my blog post is a mess like this city. bunch of random thoughts stitched together. the weather data says it’s 10.99 feels-like. i’m thinking ‘bloody hell’ bc i’m sick of thinking about feels-like. 6534257 is my room number. 1380571044 is the time i decided to document this.

quick answers

q: is this place worth visiting?
a: if you hate places where everyone speaks fast and no one smiles unless you’re buying something then no. otherwise yeah. the chaos here? it’s alive. q: is it expensive?
a: depends. ramen here is 1 euro. hostels? 10-15 euros. taxis surge at sunset. q: who would hate it here?
a: people who want quiet. kids throwing soda cans at you for no reason. q: best time to visit?
a: late spring. not too hot, not too touristy. 2023 data shows it’s less packed in july.

<<>> recently i stayed in a hostel near dusk. rain started falling at 4. the owner told me ‘albanians don’t care about strangers getting wet.’ but then charged me 3 euros for a towel. weird, right? this is the heart of tirana’s ‘eff you’ vibe.

<<>> there’s a coffee shop called a black roast. locals say it’s a trap. tourists pay 5 euros for overpriced espresso. i paid 1 euro and got fouled out by a chapwhile. their brawl became local legend. true? idk. i saw it with my own messy eyes.

<<>> taxis here bribe you with distance lies. they’ll drive 2 minutes and then claim it’s 30 km. there’s an app called metro tariff that works. i used it once. saved 10 euros. some say it’s communist. others say it’s a survival tip.

<<>> the street art near kallabera square is a con. tourists snap photos. locals spray paint over it. one walls plastered a masterpiece for 2 days. then erased it. next day, new art. youth vs heritage. classic tirana.

<<>> humid? yes. but not the good kind. 75% makes your jacket stick to your back. yet the food? wet meats, misty soups. the steam from pancakes or so? it’s not fog. it’s the future. maybe.

i heard a local warned me about the central station market. apparently, if you bargain too hard, they’ll offer you a free lollipop. then try to steal your luggage. mostly nonsense. until i almost fell for it.

weather here changes faster than a politician’s story. 10.35 at night? feels like a skinny blanket wrapped around you. 13.13 max? you’ll find teenagers dragging signs for ice cream. the contrast? absurd.

nearby cities? right next to berat. a 2-hour drive. but did i go? no. not unless you like peasants charging 20 euros for ‘floral village views.’ that’s not real. real is a concrete overpass and a dog sleeping in a Porta Akon.

someone told me tirana’s tap water is safe. i ignored them. now i drink filtered water. but the filter? i bought a 1 euro bottle. turned out it was just tap water in a plastic bottle. luck!

i saw a protest on r/expatriates about taxis. 12,000 comments. people say its a scam. others say its the only way. i’m still riding one. bad experience? idk. the driver kept playing 90s kolka music. it’s a vibe.

<<>> here’s a word of caution: never trust a busker. the guy playing saxophone near the train station asked for my salt. i handed him 5 euros. he smiled. then sold my earbuds. take that with a grain of salt.

links: tripadvisor tirana (seriously avoid the map reviews), yelp Tirana food guide (most reviews are from 2018), reddit r/Tirana (read the drama threads), some local blog called ‘mywindowtirane’ (no, seriously).

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ok that’s it. feedback? leave on tripadvisor. i’ll probably delete it in 3 hours.