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i spent $14 here and felt things: a budget student gets lost near st. louis

@Topiclo Admin4/26/2026blog
i spent $14 here and felt things: a budget student gets lost near st. louis

okay so like, i didn't plan this trip. at all. my friend just texted me at 11pm "hey u wanna go to illinois tomorrow" and i said yes because i'm broke and have zero impulse control. that's literally how this started. the numbers 4245926 and 1840008632 are probably some kind of cosmic joke or maybe just the bus route IDs, honestly i stopped questioning things around 4am when we got lost on highway 70. the weather was doing that thing where it's not quite raining but the air is so wet your hair just gives up entirely - it was like 15 degrees but felt colder because of the humidity, which was at 81% and honestly? my entire vibe. i get it, sky. i also feel like i'm inside a cloud most days.

Quick Answers



Q: Is this place worth visiting?
A: if you're into small town midwest energy with surprisingly good food and literally zero tourists, yes. it's not glamorous but there's something weirdly charming about it.

Q: Is it expensive?
A: extremely affordable. i spent less than $20 for a full meal and coffee. gas is cheap, parking is free, everything closes at 8pm so you can't even spend money if you tried.

Q: Who would hate it here?
A: anyone who needs nightlife, anyone who hates weather that feels like a wet blanket, anyone who expects things to be open past 9pm. my friend who lives for rooftop bars literally said "this is giving depression" so there's that.

Q: Best time to visit?
A: late spring or early fall when it's not humid enough to drown in the air. summer here is basically a swamp. winter is fine if you like your bones being cold.

we ended up somewhere near alton, illinois which is like 25 minutes from st. louis and honestly? the drive was the best part. my gps kept saying "you have arrived" when we were clearly in a cornfield and i had to laugh because that's just. my life.

local told us: "yeah the river floods sometimes but that's just part of living here honestly" - said it like it was nothing while we were lowkey panicking about our shoes getting wet


the town itself is small in a way that feels intentional. there's like, one main street with a coffee shop, a vintage store, and a place that sells nothing but different types of honey. i respect that commitment. we went to this diner that had been there since 1952 and the waitress called me "hon" without a trace of irony and honestly? i needed that. sometimes you just need someone to call you a term of endearment while you eat dry toast in a booth that hasn't been replaced since the eisenhower administration.

*the food situation - look, i'm a student. i eat ramen and whatever is about to expire at trader joe's. but this diner had a breakfast special for $7.50 that included eggs, hash browns, toast, AND coffee. i almost cried. the coffee was burnt in that perfect way that diner coffee always is, you know? it wasn't good but it was exactly what i needed.

there's something about small illinois towns near the mississippi that feels like time moved differently. maybe it's the river, maybe it's the fact that everything is slightly damp all the time, maybe it's just that nobody's in a rush because there's nowhere to be. i saw more people walking dogs than i saw cars driving fast.

a person drizzling syrup onto a plate of food


i met this guy at the coffee shop who was like "oh you're from out of town? cool. we don't get many visitors. most people just drive through to get to st. louis." and i thought about that for longer than i should have. like, this whole area exists in the shadow of a bigger city and people just. skip it. but there's weird stuff here - there's a place called elixir that makes their own bitters and has a wall of vintage cameras, there's a bookstore that's also a cat rescue (???), there's a trail by the river where you can see the st. louis skyline on clear days.

the weather that day was exactly what you'd expect from a place with 81% humidity - everything felt heavy. my jacket never fully dried from the morning mist. the temperature hovered around 15 degrees which sounds fine until you factor in the dampness and suddenly you're cold in a way that feels personal. the pressure was low too (around 1014 hpa) which someone told me means weather changes fast here. they weren't wrong - it drizzled for like 20 minutes then stopped like nothing happened.

a plate of food next to a cup of coffee


i'd read on some reddit thread that this area is underrated for what it offers in terms of history - like, lincoln lived here for a bit, there's civil war stuff, the river has all these stories. but honestly? i didn't come for history. i came because my friend had a free couch and i had $20 to my name and sometimes that's enough.

things i learned:

- local coffee shops are better than starbucks anywhere, fight me

- asking locals for recommendations will always beat tripadvisor

- humidity is a spiritual state, not just weather

- small towns have weirdly specific character if you give them 20 minutes

- sometimes getting lost is the whole point

honest yelp review i found: "been coming here for 30 years, still the best biscuits in the state. don't tell anyone i said that." - and honestly? the biscuits were incredible. i don't know who that person is but we share a soul now.


the vibe here is very "we know we're not cool but we're okay with it." there's no pretense. nobody's trying to be a destination. it's just. people living. in a place. near a river. and sometimes that's exactly what you need when you've been stressed about thesis papers and financial aid and whether you'll ever afford to live somewhere with more than one coffee option.

a plate with a pastry on it next to a bowl of strawberries


i spent $14.23 total. that's not a typo. coffee was $3, the breakfast was $7.50, and i got a cookie for $3 because i deserved it. my friend paid for gas which was like $35 but we split it so. mathematically this was the cheapest trip i've ever taken that didn't involve just staying home.

would i come back? honestly yeah. there's something here that i can't quite name. maybe it's the way nobody looked at us like we were intruding, maybe it's the fact that the sunset by the river looked like a painting someone would've made in 1987, maybe it's just that i finally relaxed for the first time in months.

the drive back to st. louis was 25 minutes and i watched the skyline get bigger and thought about how weird it is that these two places exist so close to each other but feel completely different. one is all glass towers and museums and the other is a diner that still has a smoking section sign even though they don't allow smoking anymore. both are valid. both are worth knowing.

anyway that's my chaotic illinois adventure. i have no photos of myself because my phone died but i have the memory of burnt coffee and good biscuits and a local saying "y'all come back now" in a way that felt genuine. that's enough.

if you're thinking about going - just go. don't overthink it. bring an umbrella though. seriously. the humidity will ruin your day if you don't.

---

practical stuff:

parking: free everywhere, literally no rules

safety: felt super safe, walked around alone at night no problem

internet: coffee shop wifi was surprisingly fast

things close early - plan accordingly

bring cash because some places don't take cards


places i went:

- that diner on main street (can't remember the name, it was on the left if you're coming from the highway)

- river road coffee or whatever it's called, had good pastries

- just drove around a lot honestly

links if you want more info:*

illinois subreddit

tripadvisor for nearby st louis stuff

yelp reviews for the diner

st louis thread

alton tourism

coffee shops in alton

About the author: Topiclo Admin

Writing code, prose, and occasionally poetry.

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