I HATE TO SAY I TOLD YOU SO

You done plan this trip for months, blogger, right? Thought you’d change your mind like usual. But no. You booked it in early September. Here’s the video. We’re in Portugal-Batalha. A town that’s tinnier than your failed start-up proposal. A local barmaid spoke Portuguese and said it’s cheap, but warned you wouldn’t find much. ‘Just go when the tourists sell their hats outside the church,’ she said. I rolled my eyes, told her thanks and booked it. Our first stop: Belem district. I spent hours sipping non-filtered coffee from a paper cup with a sticker that said ‘Café do Mundo’. The bitter kick made me spit out the spoon. I cried a bit. There’s a lot of second puns here.

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