Ho Chi Minh City: Humidity, Pho, and Questionable Karaoke Choices
okay, so. ho chi minh city. wow. just…wow. i’m still peeling the city off my skin, honestly. it’s like being hugged by a damp, fragrant cloud. i just checked and it’s clinging to everything like a determined gecko right now, hope you like that kind of thing. eighteen point four degrees, feels like eighteen point three. pressure’s steady, humidity’s…well, let’s just say bring a towel. and maybe a dehumidifier.
I’m a botanist, you see. I chase weird plants. And ho chi minh city? It’s a jungle masquerading as a metropolis. Every alleyway is bursting with life - vines snaking up buildings, tiny orchids clinging to walls, the most incredible variety of herbs I’ve ever seen. I spent a solid three hours just staring at a single banyan tree near *District 1, trying to figure out its age. It probably predates the entire city, honestly.
I was supposed to be here for a week, cataloging some rare ferns in the Cu Chi Tunnels. Don’t even get me started on those tunnels. Claustrophobic doesn’t even begin to cover it. But I got distracted. Terribly distracted. By the food. Oh, the food. Pho, banh mi, bun cha… I’m pretty sure I’ve gained five pounds just from inhaling steam. I found this amazing little place on Pham Ngu Lao Street - seriously, look it up on Yelp. It’s called Pho Hoa Pasteur. Don’t let the touristy location fool you; it’s legit.
“Apparently, if you order the beef tendon pho, you have to eat the tendon. Otherwise, you’re insulting the chef. That’s what a very serious-looking woman with a conical hat told me.”
Speaking of locals, they’re…interesting. If you get bored, Vung Tau and Long An are just a short hop away. I tried to strike up a conversation with a guy selling flowers near the Notre-Dame Cathedral Basilica of Saigon. He just stared at me blankly and then started chanting something in Vietnamese. I think he was trying to sell me good luck. Or maybe he was just confused.
I did manage to find some incredible specimens though. There’s this crazy vine, Tetrastigma cobbleeri, growing all over the place. It’s a parasitic vine that basically strangles other plants. Beautiful and terrifying, all at once. I’m trying to get permission to collect some samples for research, but the paperwork is a nightmare.
Someone told me that the karaoke bars around District 3 are…an experience. I went to one. Once. It was…loud. And chaotic. And involved a lot of off-key renditions of American pop songs. I’m not sure how to describe it other than “a fever dream.” I’m pretty sure I saw a rat. Or maybe it was just the flashing lights.
I also stumbled upon a vintage market near Ben Thanh Market*. It was a treasure trove of old fabrics, faded photographs, and bizarre trinkets. I picked up a silk scarf with embroidered birds on it. It probably cost me a fortune, but I don’t care. It’s a souvenir. A reminder of this humid, chaotic, utterly captivating city. Check out this guide to vintage shopping in HCMC: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g293732-Activities-Ho_Chi_Minh_City.html
I’m heading back to the tunnels tomorrow to finish my work. But I’ll definitely be back to ho chi minh city. There’s just too much to explore. Too much food to eat. Too much questionable karaoke to endure. And way too many fascinating plants to discover. Oh, and a local warned me about the motorbike traffic. Apparently, it’s “a sport.” I’m starting to believe them. You can find some helpful tips on navigating the city here: https://www.yelp.com/search?find_desc=ho+chi+minh+city&find_loc=Ho+Chi+Minh+City,+Vietnam. Also, check out this forum for expats: https://www.expat.com/forum/asia/vietnam/
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