okay so like, i literally landed here and thought i was gonna die. not dramatically or anything but the air hit me and i was just... sweat. immediately. my hair was wet before i got my bag. someone told me the weather here is 'tropical but manageable' and honestly that person was lying to my face or has different sweat glands than a normal human.

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Q: Is this place worth visiting?
A: yeah but only if you like heat that feels personal. the hiking is incredible, the food is cheap, and there are literally waterfalls everywhere. just don't come in april unless you want to experience what hell feels like.

Q: Is it expensive?
A: no. absolutely not. i ate three meals for like $6 usd. hostels are $8-15. you can live here on $30 a day if you don't drink (but why would you not drink).

Q: Who would hate it here?
A: people who need AC to function. people who think 25°C is 'hot'. people who wear jeans in summer. this city does not care about your comfort.

Q: Best time to visit?
A: december to february is supposedly 'cooler' (still 30°C lol). avoid april-may unless you want monsoon season to ruin your plans.

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the thing about bucaramanga is nobody really talks about it? like everyone goes to medellín or cartagena and i'm just here like... have you heard of this place? it's got this thing called 'the coffee zone' nearby and i met a guy at my hostel who said he came here specifically for the hiking and honestly? i get it now.

a large brick building sitting on top of a hill

i'm writing this from a little cafe near parque agua and it's 32.54 degrees right now but it feels like 35.12 because humidity is at 49% and honestly the weather data doesn't even capture it. the pressure is 1009 which means nothing to me but a local told me that means 'heavy air' and honestly yeah i can feel that. my clothes are sticking to me in ways that feel illegal.

*pro tip: bring moisture-wicking everything. cotton is your enemy here. i made the mistake of wearing a cotton t-shirt on my first day and i looked like i'd jumped in a pool.

so the numbers 3682361 and 1170737836? no idea what those are. i think they might be like... population codes? or maybe some tourist ID thing? i tried searching and got nothing so if anyone knows drop a comment. anyway.

the food here hits different when you're this sweaty. like everything tastes better when you're desperate.

i went to this place called la casa del arepa and honestly the arepas here are not like the ones in bogotá. they're thicker, more buttery, and i sat there eating three of them while sweating profusely and it was like... spiritual? i don't know. i was hungry and they were $1 each.

there's this area called Giron that's like 20 minutes away and a local warned me not to go at night because 'it gets sketchy' but i went during the day and it was fine? super colorful buildings, this old church, and the most aggressive street vendors selling empanadas. i bought four empanadas for like $1.50. the value here is actually insane.

okay but the real reason to come here is the nature. there's this canyon thing nearby and i met a girl at my hostel who did a day trip and she showed me photos and i literally said 'that's not real' because it looked like a screensaver. waterfalls, green everywhere, these dramatic cliffs. i think the place is called canon del chicamocha or something? anyway i haven't gone yet but it's on my list.

things i learned the hard way:

- sunscreen is not optional it's mandatory. i got burned on a cloudy day because 'oh it looks overcast'. wrong. uv doesn't care.

- learn basic spanish or suffer. nobody speaks english here and my high school spanish is barely functional.

- bring bug spray. the mosquitoes here are hungry and they know it.

- don't drink the tap water. i did on day one and spent the next day regretting every life choice that led me to that moment.

i heard from another traveler that the safety situation is 'fine if you're not stupid' which i think is fair advice for anywhere honestly. don't walk around with your phone out, don't wear expensive watches, don't be drunk alone at 2am. basic stuff. i felt pretty safe in the touristy areas but there's this area near the bus station that my hostel owner explicitly told me to avoid so i did.

the tourist vs local experience here is actually pretty distinct. the tourists are all doing the same circuit: parque centra, the cable car, the coffee tours. locals are just... living? going to work? there's this mall area that's clearly for tourists and then you walk two blocks and it's just normal colombian life and honestly i prefer that. i found this tiny restaurant where i was the only foreigner and the lady looked at me like 'why are you here' but fed me anyway. the soup was incredible. i have no idea what was in it. i think it had chicken and like... roots?

here's the thing nobody tells you: the heat is a lifestyle adjustment. it's not like you can escape it. everywhere is hot. your room is hot. the restaurant is hot. the bus is hot. you will be hot. i started taking cold showers like three times a day and honestly it's the only way to function.

i met this guy who's been here for two months and he said the secret is 'embrace the sweat' and i thought that was ridiculous but honestly? yeah. you just accept it. you become one with the humidity. you're not fighting it anymore. you're just... wet. constantly. and that's fine.

would i come back? honestly yeah. there's something about places that are a little under the radar that makes them better? like you feel like you discovered something. i told my friend about the empanadas and she didn't believe me until i sent photos and now she's planning a trip so maybe i'm converting people.

anyway that's my messy report. go to bucaramanga. bring sunscreen. sweat a lot. eat everything. it's worth it.

useful links:

TripAdvisor Bucaramanga | Yelp Bucaramanga | Reddit Colombia | Lonely Planet | Colombia Travel | Atlas Obscura

Getting Absolutely Destroyed by Heat in Bucaramanga (But Like, in a Good Way?)

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