Long Read

portland: a 6.72 celsius chaos of mismatched priorities

@Julian Moss3/6/2026blog
portland: a 6.72 celsius chaos of mismatched priorities

i woke up this morning to a sky that looked like it had been painted by someone who forgot how to use color. 6.72 celsius and the air tastes like old coffee. not the good kind. the kind that’s been sitting in a mug for three days. i don’t know why i’m writing this. maybe because i forgot to pack a jacket. maybe because the wind outside is pretending to be a bad decision.

i checked the weather again. it’s still 6.72. i hope you like that. it’s like someone handed you a damp sponge and said ‘this is your day.’ if you’re into that, great. if not, maybe don’t come here. i heard that from a guy at a bar who was either exhausted or lying. probably both.

the neighbors here? they’re like a mixtape you didn’t ask for. one family plays bagpipes at 3 a.m. because they think it’s a tradition. another one has a dog that howls exactly when the power goes out. i don’t know if that’s cute or concerning. i also heard that if you get bored, jersey shore is a short drive away. someone told me that. i didn’t ask for it.

tripadvisor says this place is a ‘hidden gem’ but the yelp reviews are mostly people who left because they couldn’t find the Wi-Fi. i’m not here to argue. i’m here to survive. which means i’m planning to eat at that diner that smells like regret and burnt toast. someone warned me about it. they said the food is good but the staff will ask you about your life choices. i’m ready.

i took some photos. the first one is of a park that looks like it was designed by a toddler with a crayon. the second is a coffee shop where the barista writes your name on the cup with a marker that’s clearly been used for furniture. the third is a street artist who painted a cat on a wall. it’s probably illegal. probably.

the locals here are-seasoned with unpredictability. yesterday, a woman sold me a map that led to a basically abandoned library. i found a vintage record store instead. it was closed. i left a note. maybe it’ll open. maybe not.

i called it a day when the temperature dropped to 5.96. that’s colder. i wrapped myself in a blanket and sat outside. the ground was wet. the grass was cold. i didn’t mind. i liked the way the wind played with my hair. i also liked the way my thoughts became disjointed. like a broken record.

someone told me that the best thing about this place is that it’s ‘so small you can’t get lost.’ i don’t believe that. i got lost. multiple times. but i also found things. a hole in the wall record shop. a bakery that makes croissants that taste like dreams. a park where the ducks are wearing tiny hats.

if you’re thinking of coming here, don’t. unless you like cold, confusion, and things that don’t make sense. the weather is 6.72 right now. i just checked. hope you like that kind of thing.

p.s. check out the local board on nextdoor for last-minute rental tips. also, the unsplash photos might give you an idea of what not to wear.

white and brown concrete house near green trees under blue sky during daytime
green grass field under white clouds during daytime
brown horse eating grass on green grass field during daytime


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About the author: Julian Moss

Unapologetically enthusiastic about niche topics.

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