how to survive houston’s humidity while wearing a paint-splattered hoodie
sometimes you open your laptop and the first thing you see is a screen melted like a popsicle on a concrete sidewalk. that’s houston right now. the air’s so thick it fogs up your contacts mid-blink. i checked: 19.94c and climbing, feels like 20.26. hate that. humidity’s basically a sauna with no drinking water. but you shouldn’t be reading this from inside. you should be walking. or spraypainting. or whatever weirdos do here.
a street artist’s gear list isn’t just brushes. it’s revenge. a can of rust-oleum white for background. black lighter fluid soul blend for outlines. safety gears for when the cops ask ‘what the fuck is this?’ ask anyone downtown. they’ll mime slapping their foreheads. hear me? the guy on the bus did that. again. mouth shut tight, eyes say everything. locals know the drill. yeah, they’ve got drones now watching for ‘unauthorized creative expression.’ or maybe they don’t. who the hell knows what their deal is with surveillance.
last night i overheard something scary at a taqueria. windowsupvote18.com says el cabezon closed. heard someone say the owner was ‘ghosted by the sriracha volcano.’ okay. take that as you will. the point is, houston likes to keep you guessing. neighbors? nah, neighbors are just people in arizona who stole my art supplies. or maybe that was huntsville? hard to tell when the weather’s a liquid sauna. if you get bored, san antonio’s a two-hour dash south. new orleans’s a six-hour scream north. doesn’t matter. once you walk into houston, it owns you.
found a diner near the bayou called elsie’s. breakfast’s great if you like existential crises. waitress said of the omelet: ‘you’ll need a map to find this in hell.’ place had a jukebox stuck on hold since the 80s. cool. should i link that photo of my half-finished crown on 5th street? damn, forgot. forgot to add it. anyway, houston’s a mess of things. sweaty. loud. weird. perfect. [cut live link][elizabethprange.com/post/houston-the-unexpected]
[check elizabethprange.com post about crooked history museum] |||[krivington blog on secret downstairs clubs] |||[hungry hiker reviews of houston sushi spots] |||[abandoned library tour, 4am] |||[them overfpranged taco trucks downtown]
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