Guam Marathon Diaries: Sweat, Glitch Bibs, and 4043988

i'm still not sure if i'm dehydrated or just in shock, but let me tell you about the guam marathon. i flew in from seoul-yeah, i'm a marathon runner who thinks running 26.2 in humidity is a good idea-and the moment i landed, the air hit me like a warm, wet towel. the weather here is no joke: 25.97°c, humidity 87%, pressure 1008 hpa. i don't know what pressure means for running, but i know my lungs felt like they were filled with cotton candy.

at the expo, i got my bib and it was 4043988. i asked the volunteer, 'is this a typo?' she said, 'no, our system crashed and we just printed whatever came out.' so i ran with a number that looks like a windows error code. great for morale. on the course, there was a marker that said 1316874021. i thought i was seeing things. turned out it was a geodetic survey marker from the navy-guam has tons of those. but in my exhausted mind, i decided it was the course distance in meters or something. runner logic.

the race started at 5am to avoid the worst heat, but by 6am, the sun was already brutal. i kept checking my watch: temp 25.97, feels_like 25.97-no relief! humidity 87% means every step feels like wading through pudding. i passed an aid station where a volunteer said, 'someone told me that the water here is actually cold, but it's always warm.' she was right. the water was luke-warm, and the sports drink tasted like saltwater. i heard from a local at the start line that the course record is held by some military guy who runs it in his boots. 'crazy, right?' he said. i believed him.

if you get bored of running the same loop-the course is basically a out-and-back along the coast-the island of saipan is a short flight away. i met a guy who runs the saipan marathon every year. 'less humid, more history,' he said. or, if you want more chaos, the philippines are a couple of hours by plane. manila has a marathon too, but the air pollution is a whole other challenge.

i relied on yelp for post-race food. found a place called 'kaddo's' that has the best red rice and pancit. Yelp review said it's authentic, and it was. but the local warned me: 'someone told me that the best kelaguen is at a roadside stand, but if you eat it before the race, you'll be on the portable toilets all morning.' i ate it anyway. worth it.

the course was scenic but deceptive. the first half is flat along the bay, then you hit this hill around mile 18 that no one mentions. i heard it from a drunk guy at the pre-race pasta party: 'yeah, the hill's a mother, but the view from the top is worth it.' he was right about the hill, wrong about the view-i was too busy gasping to appreciate it. why isn't this on TripAdvisor for the marathon? because tripadvisor is for tourists, not runners.

i've linked to the official marathon site Guam Marathon and a running blog that has detailed elevation maps Marathon Guide. also, check out the guam visitors bureau for other events Visit Guam.

here's the map of the route i was cursing for 4 hours:

see that little hill near the turnaround? that's the one that broke me. the ocean views were nice, i guess. here's a photo that almost captures it:

after the race, i crashed at a hostel recommended on a local board called 'guam backpackers'. $25 a night, shared with other runners. one guy from california said he runs marathons to justify his travel. 'i tell my wife it's for training, but really i just want to see new places,' he admitted. i understood.

so, would i recommend the guam marathon? yeah, if you're into humidity that makes you feel like you're melting, bib numbers that look like computer glitches, and hills that appear out of nowhere. the medal is cool, though-it doubles as a bottle opener. i heard that from a ghost hunter who also runs marathons. 'the old spanish fort on the course is haunted,' he said, 'but i was too tired to notice.' fair enough.

i'm still recovering, but my legs are starting to remember what normal feels like. next up? maybe the saipan marathon. or a nap. probably a nap.

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