Rio de Janeiro: Sticky Pavement & Samba Dreams (and a LOT of Humidity)
okay, so. rio. where do i even begin? i’m a botanist, right? i’m supposed to be waxing poetic about the flora, the biodiversity, the sheer life bursting from every crack in the sidewalk. and there is that, don’t get me wrong. but honestly? it’s mostly just…sticky. like, everything is perpetually damp and coated in a fine film of something. i think it’s a combination of humidity and…well, i’m not entirely sure. probably just rio being rio.
I just checked and it’s…a blanket of warm, heavy air right now. like breathing through a damp towel. hope you like that kind of thing. it’s 22.27 degrees, feels like 22.9, and the pressure is 1013. humidity is a solid 90%. i’m not even kidding. my hair has declared war on me.
I spent most of my time wandering around Santa Teresa, which is…charming, in a crumbling-colonial-villa kind of way. The streets are narrow and winding, and every corner seems to reveal a tiny cafe or a street artist selling their wares. I stumbled upon this amazing little place, Aprazível, tucked away on a hillside. The food was incredible - seriously, the best moqueca I’ve ever had. Apparently, it’s a bit pricey, but totally worth it. Someone told me that the chef sources all his ingredients locally, which, as a plant person, I appreciate.
I did a little exploring in Lapa too. It’s…a lot. Very lively, very loud, very…everything. The Selarón Steps are a must-see, obviously. It’s just…a lot of tiles. But in a good way? I guess. I overheard some drunk tourists arguing about whether the tiles were “authentic” or not. Honestly, who cares? It’s a giant, chaotic mosaic. Embrace the chaos.
“A local warned me about the pigeons in Lapa. Apparently, they’re not afraid of anything. He said, ‘They’ll steal your sandwich, lady. Don’t even think about it.’”
I tried to find some decent coffee. It’s surprisingly hard. I’m a coffee snob, okay? I need my single-origin, ethically-sourced, pour-over goodness. Most places just serve…regular coffee. Which is fine, I guess. But not amazing. I did find one place, Café Contente, that had a decent espresso. It wasn’t life-changing, but it was acceptable. Check out their menu here: https://www.cafecontente.com.br/.
I spent a few hours in the Jardim Botânico. That was actually pretty amazing. The diversity of plant life is incredible. I saw orchids, bromeliads, towering palm trees…it was a botanist’s dream. I even spotted a few capybaras! They’re surprisingly chill. You can find more info about the garden here: https://www.jardimbotanicorio.gov.br/.
If you get bored, Niterói and Petrópolis are just a short drive away. I didn’t make it to either, but I heard they’re worth a visit. I also heard that the beaches are…crowded. Like, really crowded. I’m more of a quiet-nature-and-plants kind of person, so I mostly stuck to the hills and gardens.
Honestly, rio is…intense. It’s beautiful, chaotic, vibrant, and sticky. It’s not a relaxing vacation, but it’s definitely an experience. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Just…bring a dehumidifier. And maybe some industrial-strength bug spray. And a really good umbrella. And a willingness to embrace the chaos. Oh, and check out some local events on Tripadvisor: https://www.tripadvisor.com/Attractions-g301903-Activities-Rio_de_Janeiro_State_Brazil.html. You might find some cool samba shows or street festivals. Yelp has some good restaurant reviews too: https://www.yelp.com/search?find_desc=restaurants&find_loc=Rio+de+Janeiro%2C+Rio+de+Janeiro%2C+Brazil.
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