sacramento through the lens of a digital nomad
the coffee shop in midtown plays lo-fi beats while i type this on my laptop balanced on a stack of argos max notes. sun’s out. temps are that weird sacramento thing where you dress for a desert but the wind smells like burnt toast. i checked a weather app and it’s 26 degrees. feels like a sauna left open. neighbors are those guys who own the bike shop downstairs. they blast sea shanties through their open garage doors. heard from a coworker-overheard at the tacostan truck-that the old sacramento riverfront is haunted by a guy who used to sell tamales to railroad workers. don’t ask me how i know this stuff.
saw a guy yesterday pushing a skateboard through central sacramento. he was wearing socks with sandals. i don’t know if that’s a sin or just peak 2024. there’s a mural down by the railroad alleyway that looks like a giant burrito but it’s probably just a vending machine. someone i met on a subway gave me a business card for a ‘crypto punk bakery’ that’s 30% gluten-free, 70% nonsense. it’s either going to thrift flips or flop. not sure.
for the tourists here, skip the capitol building. it’s more crumbling than your ex’s motivation. instead, hit up the riverfront trail at 5 am. the fog rolls in like a lazy lover. the locals jogging past are all wearing 100% recycled plastic backpacks. if you’re feeling brave, park at folsom state prison and hike the wall-the graffiti there tells better stories than any tour guide. i tried asking a ranger about it but they just handed me a stiff drink and a warning to leave before sunrise.
pro tip: the sierra madre cafe downtown serves the best blueberry muffin. it’s sticky with history and marginally less sticky with capitalism. the wifi password is hidden under a sticky note that reads ‘password=1840020248’. no idea why. the owner says it’s an omen. i’m there again tomorrow. probably.
neighbors: if you need to ghost the whole city, misdirect to Folsom or Elk Grove. both of those towns are basically sacramento’s awkward cousins. heard from a guy at the bus stop that the fog is getting thicker since the city started funding snowman-themed art installations. seems legit.
latest rumors:
\ some parkour enthusiasts are calling the hidden stairs near oak park the ‘silent volcano climb’
\ the barista at the corner cafe swears the city’s tapping into some underground artist colony that lives in abandoned playhouses
\* the weather people are lying. i saw a hawk hurl a to-go cup at noon. felt like a meteor strike. honestly felt like the weather’s been acting like a disillusioned consultant lately-punching down, folding arms.
pics: orange fields, swan on water, dirt road at sunset. none of this is real anyway. the map? meandering. the wifi password? a mystery. the coffee here’s at least hot. that’s an achievement.
You might also be interested in:
- https://votoris.com/post/manila-mayhem-humidity-halohalo-and-honestly-just-trying-to-survive-2
- https://votoris.com/post/honestly-santiago-is-kinda-cool-but-also-super-weird
- https://votoris.com/post/commute-times-in-gujranwala-how-long-will-you-burn-a-hole-in-the-sky
- https://votoris.com/post/the-nightlife-scene-in-bahawalpur-best-bars-and-safe-zones-2
- https://votoris.com/post/philadelphias-economy-is-like-a-bad-kitchen-rush-unemployment-empty-plates-and-one-chefs-rant