Portland Rain & Really Weird Vibes
okay, so like, i’m pretty sure i’m running on fumes and lukewarm coffee. 4367734 and 1840006175… honestly, those numbers just keep swirling around in my head. it’s like a bad dream about spreadsheets. the weather here is… intense. i just checked and it's...there right now, hope you like that kind of thing. 96% humidity, feels like -0.06, temp -0.51, pressure 1034. it’s clinging to you like a damp wool blanket. seriously.
Portland. it’s… a lot. i landed yesterday and immediately felt like i’d stumbled into a Wes Anderson film directed by a slightly anxious pigeon. the streets are all pastel and crooked, and everyone seems to be wearing a vintage band t-shirt and a permanent expression of mild bewilderment. i’m staying in a tiny studio above a kombucha brewery - the fermentation smells are intense, let me tell you. it’s not bad, just…present.
I spent the morning wandering around Mississippi Avenue, which is basically a curated collection of artisan shops and overpriced coffee. i grabbed a pastry from Blue Mountain Bakery (someone told me their blueberry scones are legendary, but i mostly just wanted something to hold while i stared at the rain) and then stumbled upon a street artist doing incredible chalk murals. he was using this weird, almost iridescent chalk - it looked like it shimmered in the grey light. he was muttering about ‘capturing the melancholy of the rain’ - pretentious, but the art was actually pretty sick.
I overheard some drunk advice at a dive bar last night - a guy named Silas, who claimed to be a retired taxidermist, said to ‘follow the pigeons.’ Apparently, they know where the good ramen is. i’m taking that as a serious recommendation. I also heard that the International Rose Test Garden is a total tourist trap, but honestly, the roses are pretty.
Speaking of weird, i found this tiny shop selling vintage prosthetic limbs. Seriously. Like, actual, old prosthetic limbs. It was called ‘Echoes of Mobility’ and the owner, a woman named Beatrice, was incredibly enthusiastic about the history of orthotics. She kept offering me a ‘leg’ to hold. I politely declined. I checked Yelp and it has 4.5 stars - apparently, it’s a ‘quirky Portland experience.’ I’m not arguing.
My gear list is a disaster, obviously. i’m pretty sure i left my charger at home. and my rain boots. and my sense of direction. i’m relying heavily on Google Maps and the kindness of strangers. Here’s what i did manage to pack:
A ridiculously oversized hoodie (essential)
A notebook and pen (for documenting my descent into madness)
A portable charger (fingers crossed)
A half-empty bottle of hand sanitizer (priorities)
* A collection of melancholic indie playlists
I’m planning on checking out Powell’s City of Books tomorrow - someone told me it’s a labyrinthine wonderland of literature. I also want to hike up to Pittock Mansion for a view of the city (if the rain ever stops). It’s about an hour’s drive, but if you get bored, [Seattle] and [Eugene] are just a short drive away.
Seriously, if you’re looking for a place that’s simultaneously charming and unsettling, Portland is your spot. It’s like a slightly broken, beautifully decorated dollhouse.
I’m heading to a coffee shop now - need to refuel. I heard that Stumptown is the best, but honestly, i’m just looking for something strong and black.
And one last thing: don’t trust anyone who tells you Portland is ‘hip.’ It’s just…weird. Really, really weird.
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- https://votoris.com/post/skateboarders-messy-guide-to-bern
- https://votoris.com/post/midnight-musings-in-semarang