coffee snob in barcelona, lol

woke up at 3am to brew a third cup of espresso for the day and immediately regretted it. the machine hissed like it hated me. barcelona’s weather is 12.15c right now, which is fine if you’re me. i dress in layers because i’m a coward. stepped outside and a guy in a neon windbreaker yelled something about ‘not blocking the sidewalk like a tourist trash can.’ i didn’t understand him but he seemed angry enough to care.

so here we are. 1012 h-pa, 50% humidity, and a sky that looks like it’s either crying or judging. neighbors here are the type that play loud spanish guitars at 2am. i heard that once. halloween decorations still up? probably. it’s november. maybe they’re just bad at mandatory seasonal transitions. if you get bored, valencia is a short bus ride away, though the buses here run like they’re playing chicken with time.

last week someone told me that the tapas place on carrer de revolución is actually owned by a guy who films bikini porn. i didn’t confirm it. probably a lie. but then again, why not? barcelona’s gray alleys have a way of making secrets stick. i heard another rumor from a bartender-someone warned me that the street artist who paints dragons on random walls is actually a former mafia accountant. haven’t verified that either. might be a red herring.

weather here is like the city’s mood. 7.93c at night? cozy. 12.15c during the day? meh. it’s stable. boring. i like that. my coffee today has a crack in the cup. it’s 400ml and i’m 37% through. still warmer than the tap water, which is a win. i just checked and it’s…there right now, hope you like that kind of thing. (link to local coffee shop review: https://tripadvisor.com/review/...)

i need more caffeine. grabbed a cortado from café del mar. their foam is a scam. it’s basically just hot milk pretending to be art. but i paid 4 euros for it. barcelona’s prices are the same as new york, but the service is from the 90s. love it.

someone else online said that the sun sets so slowly here you could take a nap watching it. i called it a lie. but then i forgot my phone was dead and saw it for real. it was weird. the light felt like it was judging my life choices. i took a photo of a pigeon stealing a sandwich and it looked like a mating ritual. (link to yelp for neighborhood map: https://yelp.com/biz/...)

neighbors here are weirdly passionate about plastic recycling. one old woman outside my apartment tried to convince me last week that ‘bio bags’ are a government conspiracy. i didn’t fact-check. she looked offended when i didn’t agree. maybe she’s right. who knows?

last night i screamed at a window because a neighbor was playing mariachi music at 11pm. turned out it was just his dog. still, i called him a disgrace. he replied with a group chat invite. now i’m in a ‘barcelona local band’ group chat where everyone argues about whether paella is a crime against humanity.

photos: [img src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1574278300200-08d085f84838?crop=entropy&cs=tinysrgb&fit=max&fm=jpg&w=1080&q=80" alt="coffee addict clinging to espresso machine" width="100%"] [img src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1574278300201-1a0d2b5e8b6e?crop=entropy&cs=tinysrgb&fit=max&fm=jpg&w=1080&q=80" alt="rain-soaked streets in barcelona" width="100%" ] [img src="https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1574278300202-2b3d1c5a8f3c?crop=entropy&cs=tinysrgb&fit=max&fm=jpg&w=1080&q=80" alt="sunset over a crumbling church" width="100%"]

if you’re here, you’re probably broken inside. barcelona fixes that. or maybe it’s just the coffee. (link to unsplash photo gallery: https://unsplash.com/photos?query=barcelona)

wait. did i mention the sea level is 1012? that’s the same as the pressure. coincidence? probably. i’m too tired to care.

coffee snob in barcelona, lol

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